Extra God, Hold the Theologians

If anyone needs an education, it's me! I'm going through some amazing things right now. So great I don't have words for all of it! I finished reading a book tonight so I thought "that book was great now I can start the next!". I bought two together. The second one was about modern/post modern. I can't find. I saw a book on theology by Ryrie on the dining room chair; I passed it up. I thought to myself "I don't want to learn or hear about religion, someone else's thoughts on God or opinions, I want to learn about God from God!". It's amazing! I don't wanna hear it. I just want to hear God! PTL somewhere, somehow I've gotten to the point He is all I want. I am in the middle of something. A time commitment thing. I don't know how long it will last. I know how long I want it to last but we shall see if the spirit is stronger than the flesh. This thing, if it goes as long as I'm hoping, it will cross over a very important day in my little boys life. I won't be able to celebrate completely that day but after my commitment is over I can. I thought "OH NO! What am I going to do?! I can't miss blah blah blah...!" Then I realized "I CAN" and if this "thing" goes on "I WILL". God has to come first. Putting yourself aside as a mother is a daily thing... but ask me to put my kids second to something... HA! But now, TODAY, I have realized I am willing to put God first. This is a big thing. I'm not bragging. I'm stunned. God is working and deserves praise for what he has done! This thing I'm going through is for God, He has let me into His courts.... closer than I've ever been! I can't believe this is really my life! PTL for being Lord and for being Lord of my life and taking a sinner like me in loving me. I have so much I want to say but even more I want to pray... I wish you all well! Thank you for sharing in my joy!